Should you pay your kids for chores?

Do you pay your kids to help around the house? Or do you expect them to help and worry that paying them would be akin to bribing them?

Research from the Halifax has shown that around 65% of children aged between eight and 15 do jobs around the house to earn their pocket money, with an average ‘pay’ of £6.35 a week.

But is it right to pay children to do chores? We spoke to some parents who all see things very differently…

“I pay per job”

Sally is a single mum to an 11-year-old son and she thinks paying children for jobs is a great way to show them the value of work.

“Dylan has jobs he has to do, like making his own bed,” she explains, “and then I pay him to do extra jobs. He might be asked to vacuum the sitting room, do the dusting, wash up after supper, that kind of thing. I make sure I don’t ask him to do too much – I don’t want it to get in the way of his school work.

“What I pay depends on how hard the job is; he gets more for vacuuming than he does for washing up. I pay him between 40p and 70p a job, and he usually does one job a day, or two a day at weekends.”

Pays: Between £5 and £7 a week

“Pocket money gets paid regardless”

Gary and Fiona have two daughters aged 12 and six, and say that they pay their pocket money each week regardless of whether or not the girls help around the house.

“We want the kids to want to help us, and we do ask them to lend a hand [especially] if we’re really busy. But our eldest needs her pocket money to keep up with her friends, not in a bad way, more to be able to go out with them when they do. And our youngest saves up her cash, so she’s learning about the value of money that way. It just felt wrong to tie their pocket money to doing jobs – they’re just kids.”

Pays: £3 to six-year-old, £5 to 12-year old a week

“We fine our kids if they don’t do their jobs”

Sue and Claire are mums to a 10-year-old son and eight-year-old daughter. They don’t ask their children to do housework but they do have to take care of their own things.

Sue explains: “We ask them to make their own beds, tidy their rooms and put their dirty clothes in the laundry basket. Toys have to be tidied away before bedtime and they have to bring their own plates into the kitchen after a meal.

“So we’re hardly the most demanding of parents, they don’t have to vacuum or anything. But if they don’t do their jobs then we cut their weekly pocket money – at the moment they get £5 a week each. If I have to do clean up after them then I take a pound or so out of their pocket money – so it’s more like they pay me to do chores!”

Is that any different to paying kids to do chores? Sue says yes it is: “We didn’t want to pay them for jobs, because then we’d never be able to ask them to help without paying them. But this seems to be a good alternative. If I ask them to help out because I’m busy then I’d never dock their pocket money if they said no.”

Pays: £5 each (assuming no fines)

Professional view

So should you pay your kids for household jobs? We asked Gwen Richardson, who runs the ToddlerCalm parenting programme in Warrington, Cheshire.

ToddlerCalm teaches that rewards such as stickers and charts can be counterproductive, by teaching youngsters to only behave well for a reward. So what is Gwen’s view on paying for chores?

“Asking children to do jobs in return for money may mean that they do their chores. However, this removes their intrinsic motivation; which is the desire to help around the house to because it is the right thing to do. That is, it ensures that the house is a safe, clean environment for the whole family. Children may also want more and more rewards [or] money as they get older and refuse to do anything when asked unless they are going to get paid.

“When children are encouraged to help from a young age and the help is appreciated they develop the intrinsic motivation to help out because it benefits the whole household.”

But doesn’t paying kids for jobs help them learn the value of money? Gwen thinks not, saying: “There is an argument that children need to learn how to earn, but no parents (that I know of!) get paid for keeping the house nice, so it doesn't make sense that children should. Children can learn about money through helping with the weekly shop or budgeting their snack money.”  

So is it ever okay to pay a child to do work? “If a child was trying to save up for something they really wanted, they may ask to do jobs in which case they should be pointed to things that are not everyday jobs such as cleaning the windows or washing the car, jobs that you may be paying someone to do anyway.”

Do you pay your children to do jobs? Is it the right approach? Have your say using the comments below.