Yahoo Finance The 20 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week (May 1-7)
The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant and succinct wit. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious musings of 280 characters or fewer.
Scroll through this week’s great tweets from women below. Then visit our “Funniest Tweets From Women” page for past roundups.
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have we tried offering a pizza party to whatever state vaccinates the most people
— Carlyn Harris, MPH (@carlynharris) May 5, 2021
what if dogs needed to wear deodorant and u had to apply it under their little arms for them
— SadeVEVO (@fillegrossiere) May 3, 2021
Thank you to all the people who gave their lives figuring out which mushrooms we can and can’t eat.
— Abbi Crutchfield (@curlycomedy) May 4, 2021
“No worries if not!” pic.twitter.com/P0zG1iH6hc
— Abby Barr (@1AbbyRoad) May 5, 2021
jeff bezos and bill gates both realized marriage is a union and left expeditiously
— shanaz (@shanaz8201) May 3, 2021
every super hot super cool girl’s boyfriend is literally just... a guy. like just a dude. just the plainest man you’ve ever seen.
— Dana Donnelly (@danadonly) May 5, 2021
Not according to my Instagram feed pic.twitter.com/wMNu9eG1UQ
— Rebecca Fishbein (@bfishbfish) May 5, 2021
kinda wild that cats just stay home all day, every day being mad at nothing
— Ella Zee 🌈👑 (@EllaZee5) May 2, 2021
He dumped me so I’m dating his landlord. We increasing the rent tomorrow.
— price🇿🇼 (@allaitermoi) May 2, 2021
every improv troupe has a guy that looks like this pic.twitter.com/7jYc8uuxPH
— Maddy ☻ (@TheirMaddesty) May 1, 2021
Imagine ur reading a breakup text on ur Apple Watch lol
— Natalie (@jbfan911) May 2, 2021
when u ask a man in brooklyn what he likes to do pic.twitter.com/fV6NcnOEWx
— emma silvers (@silvers_emma) May 5, 2021
growing up i had a friend who was convinced the lyrics were “don’t go, jason waterfalls” and i think about it constantly. why would it be that. who is jason
— helen (@helen) May 2, 2021
This is definitely the most bizarre question I have ever seen on a job application pic.twitter.com/3DzbhNCzy0
— Beeta (@beetagolsh) May 4, 2021
To ease the tension in therapy, Freud told the original “your mama” joke
— eLëni (@eleniZarro) May 5, 2021
i have a child’s understanding of what happens at an office job. what are you guys doing on the computer all day? it can’t all be emails
— miscegenation mami (@bannedmommygf) May 5, 2021
“why are you wearing a mask outside”
BECAUSE 👏 I DON’T 👏 LIKE 👏 MY FACE 👏— sare of easttown (@slothanova) May 4, 2021
Oh absolutely not: pic.twitter.com/TI1mAvFS65
— The Nostalgia Queen ➐ 👸🏽 (@Snow_Blacck) May 5, 2021
Drinking in Austin after living in New York is like spending Monopoly money. I almost died last night and I spent twenty five dollars
— Kath Barbadoro (@kathbarbadoro) May 6, 2021
Required Tenant Info: social security number, bank statements, paystubs, references, credit check, background check, job history, income history
Required Landlord Info: my name is Tony— Nori Reed (@nori_reed) May 6, 2021
Related...
The 20 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week (April 10-16)
The 20 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week (April 17-23)
The 20 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week (April 24-30)
Also on HuffPost
This article originally appeared on HuffPost and has been updated.
