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26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

  • <p>Aces in their places: When someone shouts this out, everyone runs to their station and leverages their core competency. </p>
    1/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Aces in their places: When someone shouts this out, everyone runs to their station and leverages their core competency.

  • <p>Bag of snakes: A business situation with many unexpected problems. </p>
    2/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Bag of snakes: A business situation with many unexpected problems.

  • <p>Can I stir fry an idea in your think-wok?: Could I have your opinion on this issue? </p>
    3/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Can I stir fry an idea in your think-wok?: Could I have your opinion on this issue?

  • <p>Die on the hill: To over-commit. </p>
    4/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Die on the hill: To over-commit.

  • <p>Eat a reality sandwich: Necessary to be said when someone’s ideas are completely inappropriate for the given situation. </p>
    5/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Eat a reality sandwich: Necessary to be said when someone’s ideas are completely inappropriate for the given situation.

  • <p>Feed the gorilla: To ensure that the core part of a company is solid before trying more interesting or high-risk projects. </p>
    6/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Feed the gorilla: To ensure that the core part of a company is solid before trying more interesting or high-risk projects.

  • <p>Get into bed: To begin a close business relationship. </p>
    7/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Get into bed: To begin a close business relationship.

  • <p>Hot under the collar : Angry. </p>
    8/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Hot under the collar : Angry.

  • <p>Industrial vacation: A business trip to a desirable location that is loosely related to business. </p>
    9/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Industrial vacation: A business trip to a desirable location that is loosely related to business.

  • <p>Jump the couch: When unpredictable or strange behavior has a negative impact on one’s reputation. </p>
    10/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Jump the couch: When unpredictable or strange behavior has a negative impact on one’s reputation.

  • <p>An elaborate display with no real substance; an artful deception. </p>
    11/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    An elaborate display with no real substance; an artful deception.

  • <p>Lipstick on a pig: An attempt to put a favorable spin on a negative situation. </p>
    12/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Lipstick on a pig: An attempt to put a favorable spin on a negative situation.

  • <p>Meeting assassin: Someone who hijacks a meeting with excessive questions or endless follow-on. </p>
    13/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Meeting assassin: Someone who hijacks a meeting with excessive questions or endless follow-on.

  • <p>New guy gene: The polite and friendly attitude that most new employees show, at least until they learn what they can get away with. </p>
    14/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    New guy gene: The polite and friendly attitude that most new employees show, at least until they learn what they can get away with.

  • <p>Open the kimono: Revealing confidential business information. </p>
    15/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Open the kimono: Revealing confidential business information.

  • <p>Pissing in the ocean: An action that is hopelessly trivial or meaningless. </p>
    16/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Pissing in the ocean: An action that is hopelessly trivial or meaningless.

  • <p>Queen of the pigs: The best of a bad breed; the number one loser. </p>
    17/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Queen of the pigs: The best of a bad breed; the number one loser.

  • <p>Race without a finish line: A frantic effort without a clearly defined goal. </p>
    18/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Race without a finish line: A frantic effort without a clearly defined goal.

  • <p>Safe harbor: The office bathroom. Often the only place to find a moment of peace at work. </p>
    19/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Safe harbor: The office bathroom. Often the only place to find a moment of peace at work.

  • <p>Tacit knowledge: Information that only exists within the head of an employee </p>
    20/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Tacit knowledge: Information that only exists within the head of an employee

  • <p>Unknown unknown: The most dangerous of business uncertainties. </p>
    21/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Unknown unknown: The most dangerous of business uncertainties.

  • <p>Village hall meeting: An unfortunate derivative of ‘town hall meeting’, this is a relatively small meeting held by relatively middle management. </p>
    22/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Village hall meeting: An unfortunate derivative of ‘town hall meeting’, this is a relatively small meeting held by relatively middle management.

  • <p>Whore’s market: A saturated and competitive market with no barriers to entry. </p>
    23/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Whore’s market: A saturated and competitive market with no barriers to entry.

  • <p>The practice of using the company’s photocopier, printer, or fax machine for personal reasons. </p>
    24/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    The practice of using the company’s photocopier, printer, or fax machine for personal reasons.

  • <p>Yogurt cities: Places that have an ‘active culture’, meaning a large number of museums, theatres, art galleries, etc. </p>
    25/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Yogurt cities: Places that have an ‘active culture’, meaning a large number of museums, theatres, art galleries, etc.

  • <p>Zero-zero split: The opportunity to waste time when working on two projects simultaneously by telling one boss that you’re busy with the other. </p>
    26/26

    26 funny corporate Jargon that will perplex you

    Zero-zero split: The opportunity to waste time when working on two projects simultaneously by telling one boss that you’re busy with the other.

<p>Aces in their places: When someone shouts this out, everyone runs to their station and leverages their core competency. </p>
<p>Bag of snakes: A business situation with many unexpected problems. </p>
<p>Can I stir fry an idea in your think-wok?: Could I have your opinion on this issue? </p>
<p>Die on the hill: To over-commit. </p>
<p>Eat a reality sandwich: Necessary to be said when someone’s ideas are completely inappropriate for the given situation. </p>
<p>Feed the gorilla: To ensure that the core part of a company is solid before trying more interesting or high-risk projects. </p>
<p>Get into bed: To begin a close business relationship. </p>
<p>Hot under the collar : Angry. </p>
<p>Industrial vacation: A business trip to a desirable location that is loosely related to business. </p>
<p>Jump the couch: When unpredictable or strange behavior has a negative impact on one’s reputation. </p>
<p>An elaborate display with no real substance; an artful deception. </p>
<p>Lipstick on a pig: An attempt to put a favorable spin on a negative situation. </p>
<p>Meeting assassin: Someone who hijacks a meeting with excessive questions or endless follow-on. </p>
<p>New guy gene: The polite and friendly attitude that most new employees show, at least until they learn what they can get away with. </p>
<p>Open the kimono: Revealing confidential business information. </p>
<p>Pissing in the ocean: An action that is hopelessly trivial or meaningless. </p>
<p>Queen of the pigs: The best of a bad breed; the number one loser. </p>
<p>Race without a finish line: A frantic effort without a clearly defined goal. </p>
<p>Safe harbor: The office bathroom. Often the only place to find a moment of peace at work. </p>
<p>Tacit knowledge: Information that only exists within the head of an employee </p>
<p>Unknown unknown: The most dangerous of business uncertainties. </p>
<p>Village hall meeting: An unfortunate derivative of ‘town hall meeting’, this is a relatively small meeting held by relatively middle management. </p>
<p>Whore’s market: A saturated and competitive market with no barriers to entry. </p>
<p>The practice of using the company’s photocopier, printer, or fax machine for personal reasons. </p>
<p>Yogurt cities: Places that have an ‘active culture’, meaning a large number of museums, theatres, art galleries, etc. </p>
<p>Zero-zero split: The opportunity to waste time when working on two projects simultaneously by telling one boss that you’re busy with the other. </p>
Chaitra Anand

-Chaitra Anand

How often have you found yourself nodding cluelessly or been dumb-founded when someone generously uses corporate terminology, which you had no idea about?

Here are a 26 corporate phrases, which have also made their way into common parlance, to help you better understand wordplay at work. Next time, don’t be perplexed, just read between the lines.

Image Credit: Getty Images

Source: The Ridiculous Business Jargon Dictionary